She looked at me with her clear blue eyes several days later, as she became used to the idea, and told me that, “You said something very nice to me the other night…if you meant it…”
I persuaded her over many days that I did mean it…
Our relationship improved dramatically as I set about finding ways to do as much as possible for her around the house, and our sex life began slowly to improve. She even told me that I looked “sexy” wearing her apron, that is doing the washing up and cleaning the kitchen while she flicked through magazines or played on the internet.
We began to cuddle in bed again, with Dolly accepting my cuddling actively, rather than passively putting up with it while lying on her side facing the other way as she had been doing.
We even made love properly twice on two consecutive nights. The first time I squirted almost immediately I entered into her, and she was very angry and disappointed.
Although I tried to explain that weeks and weeks without squirting made me as sensitive as a hair trigger, she had no sympathy for me whatsoever and just told me that I was no good. The second time I performed much better and made her come for the first time in many many months, although she said that it was only a “small” orgasm.
- – - -
That sex was over a month ago now and now our relationship seems to be deteriorating again, with sex disappearing off the list of possibilities.
She again became generally reticent about me in bed… For instance she said that she “doesn’t like” me eating her out and that she never has – although she used to always love it. This denying the facts confuses me and seems to be a new way of keeping me at bay. She will not let me, so I cannot do it and I do not do it. And I am not allowed to “squirt” without her consent so I do not have orgasms.
- – - -
We had a big argument recently in which I answered back angrily when she was being angry with me about something. She has always said that she will not tolerate “backchat”. She flew at me in a rage and I had to take cover. She immediately imposed a number of sanctions on me such as confiscating my car keys until further notice, meaning that I had to find other methods of transport if I needed to go anywhere, and confiscating my house key so that I had to rely on her letting me in if she chose to.
She moved to our spare room, which is larger than our bedroom, and refused me any access to the room or to her. She has told me that I have gone too far and that she will never, ever love me and that I had better get used to existing in a loveless relationship, which is the best she will be able to do. She even suggested that I move out of the house and visit her only at pre-approved times, but I begged her to let me stay.
She’s told me she always had doubts about me, she doesn’t think our attitudes or desires or priorities are the same. She knows that I want to be loved but she doesn’t think she ever can love me, although she would be prepared to struggle on for a bit if I promised to be “good” all the time. She knows that needing to be loved is my biggest need.
I took her out for dinner last Saturday night to a popular French restaurant and she got really angry with me because she said I ate my food too fast and drank too much wine. I managed to placate her though and she agreed to share our bed that night although she wrapped herself up well in one of her long cotton nightdresses with panties firmly on underneath. I slept naked in bed because it was hot and because I hoped something might happen…
We cuddled a bit, but both fell alseep soon because we were tired. In the morning I was hard; I pressed against her and she complained in an irritated voice, “There is a big rod sticking into my back; that is not something I want to feel first thing in the morning.” I tried to tuck it between her thighs through her nightdress and she pushed me away as if I were an annoying dog. She asked, “Why do I have to sleep in this bed, when I have had a nice big bed all to myself…
…It’s too hot, I slept badly…” she continued. “Perhaps you should have taken off your nightdress?” I suggested. “I need my nightdress,” she hissed in reply. I tried to kiss her, but she turned her head and told me that I had been very bad and would be IGNORED.
I am now sleeping by myself again, there has been no repeat of our bed-sharing experiment. Dolly shows no sign of giving into me or of softening her attitude. I plan to tell her soon that I will do whatever, anything, absolutely anything she wants if she will only try to love me and try to appreciate me. The pain of being so IGNORED and so undervalued and so in love and so in LUST with Dolly, while continuing to honour my vow NEVER to orgasm without her permission in her presence, is hard to bear. It seems she may only settle for total submission and even then will not love me or try to.
I thought at one stage, as mentioned in a previous post, that she may have or have had a lover. I now believe that that never in fact happened, but I remain terrified that it might. She now again rejects me as a person, while accepting my services in all ways, except sexual.
If I try to be more assertive she slaps me down, sometimes physically. If I am submissive she seems to “accept” what I do for her, but as if that is what every man should do for his wife or girlfriend. She never THANKS me for doing anything, “What? For doing what you should be doing anyway?” She does not seem to respect me at all. The truth is that I worship Dolly and I love her, but she appears just to see me as some sort of mistake.
I have now gone five weeks without orgasm, and since January 1 have only had sex a tiny number of times, maybe five times, in 9 months. I have not even seen Dolly in her underwear for over a month. She used to let me, albeit reluctantly and impatiently, kiss her bottom through her panties and to kiss gently the front of her panties. That is now my DREAM.
- – - -
My PLAN now is to fall at her feet again, RENEW my SURRENDER vows, tell her that I will show my REGRET and OBEDIENCE to her in ANY way she wants. I will tell her that I will LOVE, HONOUR and OBEY her, UNCONDITIONALLY.
I will sleep on the floor; I will sleep in the cellar; she can punish me in ANY way she thinks appropriate. I will do EVERYTHING in the house for her if she will only give me another CHANCE.
I will tell her that I hate her being angry with me so much that if she thinks I have transgressed, I would prefer she THRASHED me or FLOGGED me as hard as she likes, with any implement or any SEVERITY she wants.
“Please accept me back.” I will say. “Please do not IGNORE me. Please do not look at me with DISDAIN. Please let me back into your BED. Please LOVE me.”
- – - -
Can anyone reading this help me to get it right with Dolly? How can I get her to love me? How can I get her to sleep with me again? I need to put my plan into operation soon; is there anything else I can do?
Are any real, fierce, dominating WOMEN like Dolly reading this? What would they want from me? I need help.
I cannot be the only MAN in this situation; can any men give me advice?
Please help me if you can. Please comment, in any way you like. It cannot be worse than what I get from Dolly.
Orgasm Denial Makes Him Confused & Desperate
Female Led Relationships - Dominant Women, Submisive Men, Female Supremacy, Woman Worship, Wifedom