There’s nothing wrong with a submissive man having fantasies. He should be open about it, ask for it even but without being childish.
Expressing a fantasy to a trusted partner is, IMO, never wrong. Whining or wheedling or coercing that partner to enact that fantasy is, IMO, pretty much always wrong. These statements are true regardless of the orientation of the participants.
D/s involves more than one person:
One of my most frequent bottoms is simply not interested in bottoming unless the scene ends with an orgasm for him. I have no problem with this — I can either play with him or not, as I choose. What I *would* have a problem with would be if he didn’t express that need, did the scene anyway, and then was left feeling bad because he didn’t get his needs met. My job as a top is to make *both* of us feel fulfilled and happy, and I can’t do that if I don’t know as much as possible about both of our needs and desires.
(Old newsgroup posting.)
Originally posted 2009-03-01 06:41:21.
Submissive Fantasies & Needs
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