By Herbootlicker
(Left as a comment on one of my other blogs. One day I’m going to dig out the best of what he’s written and post it here. Shouldn’t be left hidden and buried.)
Ideal Mistress: I’ll know Her when I see Her, at least I think so. But the problem is that I’ve been disappointed so many times, I begin to doubt that She even exists in the real world. However, hope keeps me going.
Real problem is, you don’t know until you try — at least a little experience — and you have to invest time and emotional capital in the experiment. Nevertheless, the list, if only to clarify one’s thinking.
Intelligent, able to think things through so She doesn’t get either of us into a hole we can’t escape. Basically, She should know when the limit has arrived, before the safeword can be spoken: that is to say, trustworthy. Safewords, like parachutes, should be for unexpected emergencies, not for pilot error.
She must need to dominate as much as I need to submit; we should fit together like spooning in bed, on all levels. Truth to tell, a little switching now and then, if only for educational purposes, isn’t a bad idea — but not too much of that, either. Variety is spicy in all realms of life.
A sense of humor, so She doesn’t take it all too damn seriously. It’s a game, like tennis, bridge or chess: while in the zone, you play hard and try to beat (!) your mate, but then you declare an end and go back to real, if vanilla, life for a while, until it’s time for a rematch.
(At the same time, it isn’t a battle: while in domspace or slavespace, one plays the role honestly. As Her slave, I truly believe that I must serve, submit and suffer. And as Owner, She expects it and enjoys being pampered and worshiped — and does not hesitate to use the whip if Her slave does not stay in character.)
Clever and imaginative, so She can invent new variants on the basic theme. One nice little trick: inverse psychology, or the Br’er Rabbit syndrome: “Please, Mistress, not the cat, please!” “How dare you talk back to Me, dog! Twenty lashes with the cat, then, not ten, and you will thank Me after each one.” (It’s a form of topping from the bottom, yes, but She has the option of doing whatever She pleases, regardless of what Her slave says.)
Physically and mentally able to appreciate all the pleasure that a truly selfish Mistress can demand of Her slave, without worrying about hurting his feelings or making him resentful. That includes the pleasure of making him suffer as entertainment for Her — in other words, She should be a rational sadist, if I may coin the term: intelligent enough (I said that already) to know how far to go, and brave enough to go there, knowing I’m right with Her.
Oh, yes, and I hope She doesn’t mind wearing stiletto-heel boots and allowing me (note: not demanding or screaming, but graciously permitting Her slave to serve) to lick them to a high polish. Flat-heel boots are almost as good, but there’s something about a 5” stiletto heel! And please, Mistress, if this slave does not perform to Your satisfaction, use Your whip to train me.
I don’t know about the cuckold angle: that gets beyond the limits, I think, for me, because it ruins the relationship. Maybe an occasional affair, but not getting carried away. And it’s hard to stop for some people. Nor do I feel comfortable with an actual sale to another Owner, for whom I don’t have the same committed devotion.
These, like permanent and really serious mutilation, are for fiction, not life.
Discreet. That’s the only way to make sure some blue-nosed busybody doesn’t mess it all up. Rich wouldn’t hurt either, but that may be too much to expect in a practical sense. The last criterion is the one most of us think of first: Beautiful. I see so many absolutely stunning Ladies walking around, and I’m sure that fewer than 1% probably could meet all these expectations and hopes. Even the on-line beauties (I can’t begin to list them, but every man has a portfolio in his head) probably come up short in real life.
Yet still we dream, and some day, we may find the Goddess who fulfills 90%, and go for it, using our well-exercised imaginations to gloss over the other 10%. Just maybe, She will be pleased to change a tiny bit to become, after all, The Perfect Mistress and Ideal Dominant. As RLS famously wrote, “what’s a heaven for?”
Ideal Mistress
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